Saturday, March 1, 2014

Femdom Symbols

A friend asked me to read a story she'd written and comment. She apologized if "writers get that a lot," which made me laugh because that marked the first time I'd ever "gotten that." I was immensely flattered my opinion was valued. She also warned me to not expect it to be "as sensual" as my writing, which again flattered me. Then I read this story. It was well written, but I knew it would be because I was familiar with her blog and already knew she wrote well. The characters felt like they had a loving relationship as they played. I was wondering what exactly she might have meant when she said it wasn't like my writing. Then, near the end, the female character (it was a femdom story) peed on her submissive male partner.

I began writing femdom erotica for a few reasons, but one of them was that reading femdom meant running into activities that either didn't turn me on or that I didn't particular like that they turned me on. I "get" enjoying getting peed on as an expression of submission to a partner, it just goes a touch far, for me. In Serving Her, Kimberly tells Alex that peeing on him is on their "list." Their "list" is a mutual one of activities neither of them choose to participate in. It's mostly for Alex, since if Kimberly didn't want to do something, she simply wouldn't, as she tells him. But it's not a judgment against activities anyone else chooses to engage in. Kimberly spanks Alex with all kinds of implements and snaps his cock with rubber bands. Plenty of people would find that "a touch far" as an expression of love between two people. How giant of a hypocrite would I have to be to not recognize that getting peed on is simply another loving expression of dominance and submission between people different from me?

And she didn't mean, I don't think, that I would have an adverse reaction to that scene, but it struck me that she thought I would find less love between them. If two people whose tastes in femdom are close but don't quite sync up, can't come together and recognize that the love is there, how can I expect vanilla people to recognize that Kimberly and Alex share a love as strong as any two people who don't engage in female domination? Only the symbols are different, the love is the same.   

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